The Brigade: Big Brother’s Resident Ship of Fools
by Drew, the Big Brother Cynic
Confession: This week’s article was done on Tuesday... morning, to be precise. I had a job interview on Thursday
and wasn’t even sure if I would be home in time for the live show. I made it (with about 20 minutes to
spare), however, and last night’s episode plus the ensuing HoH result proceeded to put a torch to my planned
column. So, without further ado, it’s finally time to write about Big Brother’s favorite “gang that can’t shoot
straight”, the Bri-Bri-Bri-Brigade.
Thus far, the Brigade has more or less remained a secret and wholly effective alliance due to its own
ineptitude, as well as a healthy dose of luck both good and bad. Let’s run down their wheelings and dealings
The Brigade forms with Hayden already in place as HoH via a team competition. The Brigade fails to
eliminate Rachel (though it was not yet apparent just how bad a decision this would turn into), but the house
walks blindly into eliminating the Saboteur.
Matt ends up on the block after two members fail to win the veto and nearly goes home. Monet talks
her way into certain elimination.
Matt wins HoH and opts to try and backdoor Brendon instead of nominating him (and/or Rachel).
The plan famously backfires, and ends with Brigade member Hayden becoming a target.
Three of four Brigade members (Matt is ineligible) lose the HoH to Rachel. After Enzo and Hayden
don’t win the POV (though Enzo does score a 3D TV), pawn Hayden is nearly replaced by legitimate nominee
Lane after the PoV. Kristen voices her spot-on suspicions about the Brigade, and nobody believes her.
Matt wins HoH again…
While it has been proven that we can’t assume much of anything with Matt is HoH, it is probably safe to
say that nobody from the Brigade is going home this week. This means that next week the alliance will make
up three of the seven players for Head of Household and at least two of the six veto competitors.
Also, unless two Brigade members are on the block (in which case it doesn’t matter, because one is going
home regardless), they will carry a majority of the votes the rest of the way. And, even if one of them
does go home in Week 6 after this presumably safe upcoming week, they would still represent half of the
players for the Week 7 HoH.
So, I guess the point in all of this is that, despite their best efforts to screw up, it seems as though
the numbers are finally going to catch up and the Brigade is going to start running the Big Brother house.
Of course, I’ve also been positive that Wile E. Coyote was about to catch that damn Road Runner.
Misspeak(s) of the Week:
“Whenever Kathy’s on your team, it’s like that movie Weekend from Bernie’s”. – Ragan
If I had to pick a houseguest who would never appear in this section, it would probably have been
Ragan... partially because he seems like a smart guy and partially because he’s never on camera. But
you can’t disrespect the 1989 Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman classic Weekend AT Bernie’s and
expect a free pass from me.
But just when Ragan was ready to claim the entire prize…
“The best form of flattery is totally making fun of someone”. – Rach
Even early 19th-century author Charles Caleb Colton couldn’t have said it better… except for that time
that he said, “imitation is the sincerest form of flattery”. I’m pretty sure that’s the quote that Rachel
was aiming for.
Colton also once said, “When you have nothing to say, say nothing”. If only
certain houseguests would take that to heart.
As opposed to last time, when I said that Matt has to nominate Me&Brendon, this week, Matt HAS to
nominate Me&Brendon. Anything else would place him in an alliance with them in the minds of the other
houseguests. The only difference is that, this week, it seems like Rachel, who is riding a bona fide
hot streak, is the better choice for elimination than Brendon. The only curveball, which I can totally
see happening, is that scheming Matt (or whoever wins PoV) may use the opportunity to secretly score
That’s all from me. I’m betting that my predictions are all wrong within 24 hours. Any takers?